I wake up to the sound of his crying. Its 5:30AM and he is up for the day. I am tired but I get up and see his face turn to joy when he sees me. I am tired and he is tired so we head out the door for a walk on a sleepy Sunday morning. It is quiet. So quiet for this urban environment. No trains or planes or sounds of sirens. I look around as I pass down the street. No one is awake, or if they are, they are inside reading their morning newspaper and drinking their first cup of coffee. I breathe in the silence, thankful for this moment. I have been ungrateful for so long. I have been looking downward to the pit instead of arms lifted toward God. I look around, the flowers are exploding in color. The birds are lifting their voices to heaven, singing a cacophony of sounds, some in unison and others with their own unique song to sing. I have been missing this for far too long.
I live in an oasis right here in the midst of the bustle of the city.
My neighbors and I on this sleepy street may be different in many ways, but we have this one thing in common: we love the beauty of the outdoors. Anyone who chose to live on this street, chose to live here because they are a lover of flowers, grass, trees. My neighbor next to me planting daisies by my window so I can enjoy them. Flowers are growing every where, in love planted by those that care about true beauty. I have missed it, because I have focused on how small it is, how tiny our yards are in comparison to the overflowing splendor of country life I grew up in and the beauty of the mountains. I have missed the tiny joys of how God has provided a retreat and a yard for my children to run around, a place to grow fruits and vegetables. He knew I would need space and he gave it to me, right in the heart of a busy place.I have been ungrateful for far too long.
I mourn the fact that I have taken so much for granted. My family. My health. Peace. Flowers exploding into bloom. I am always looking for the next big thing instead of enjoying this moment. I am making a choice. A choice to nourish the life that God has given me. I want to nourish my relationships, my house, and especially my family. I want to choose these things that fill me up with life.
I need to reframe the way I see things. I need to see with eyes of thankfulness instead of eyes that always want more.
Jesus, forgive my ungratefulness. Oh how I have missed what you have given me and always want more. Forgive me. Help me to take the time to see the beauty you have provided. In your precious name Jesus, Amen. Continue reading